The Next Big Step to Your Evolution is the Balancing of Your Sexual Energies

''The next big step to your evolution is the balancing of your sexual energies''...

One day, I heard that sentence in my mind and I thought: ''That's not crazy at all...''

We live in a time and space where we have lost the true meaning of sexuality. We have forgotten the sacredness of this act and have traded it for nothing more than ''fast food''. I once read somewhere : «With sex becoming easier to get, love is harder to find» or something along those lines. How it resonated with my heart... Sexuality is natural, desire is natural, but when we are not balanced within, we do not express them in a healthy way in our lives.

The truth is, with so many choices on the ''menu'', we experience quantity at the detriment of quality. From dating websites, to dating apps, to pornography and sex chatrooms, we are only two clicks away from a dependance that starts innocently in the comfort of our homes. But where does this ''pull'' to darkness comes from?

Let's go back to our childhood, to the first time where our parents invalidated us in some way. It might have been a big or a smaller thing and in most cases, they didn't even mean to do harm, they did the absolute best they could at that time. Yet, as children, pure beings of light with hearts so wide, we got confused and memorized the hurt of this abandonment. A wound was created and started to feed off from more pain. Later, maybe we got excluded or laughed at by other students or by a teacher in high school, for example.

It's also around that same time that we started to discover our body, our sexuality and how good it felt to escape through an orgasm for a couple of seconds – a feeling of exhilaration and pure bliss and a reminiscence of unconditional love. However, as the cycle of victimization continued on a personal level, and the wound got deeper, something strange happened in our chemistry and a connection was made. We got hooked to the rush of getting hurt, sexually and emotionally. It validated the false belief we held about ourselves of ''not being good enough''. A five-second orgasm for a lifetime of pain, a thrill stronger than cocaine.

The fantasies got wilder, to the point where they were almost insatiable. And what was hiding behind it? The root cause of it all? It was that wound. And it's the same thing for those who victimize others sexually. It's the same wound expressed differently. 

But what are we truly seeking in those meaningless interactions? To escape the pain by inflicting more pain, either to ourselves or others, because it's the only way we have known to love and to be loved, when in the end, all that we want is to feel accepted. A kind of love that we can only give to ourselves and that will eventually heal the wounding. Yet, the irony is that we keep fishing for the attention of somebody else and it perpetuates the cycle of suffering.

What will you do to love and honor yourself today? The next big step to your evolution is the balancing of sexual energies. Remember that. Take that first step that will lead you to the fulfilment of your destiny.

Text © 2016 Vincent Alexandre

Image © Can Stock Photo Inc. / Wisky